What the Great Thinkers Say
Seneca
Seneca wrote an entire book on anger, calling it the most destructive emotion. He taught that anger comes from unmet expectations and can be prevented by adjusting what we expect.
The greatest remedy for anger is delay — pause before you react.
Epictetus
Epictetus taught that anger comes not from events but from our judgments about them. Change your interpretation and the anger dissolves.
It is not things that disturb us, but our opinion of things.
Buddha
The Buddha compared anger to holding a hot coal — you are the one who gets burned. He taught mindful observation of anger without acting on it.
Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal — you are the one harmed.
Zhuangzi
Zhuangzi used the parable of the empty boat: when we realize most offenses are impersonal, our anger fades. Ego is the real fuel of rage.
If an empty boat bumps into yours, you feel no anger — the ego creates rage.
Marcus Aurelius
Marcus Aurelius reminded himself that people who wrong us are often ignorant, not malicious. Understanding this defuses anger before it takes hold.
When offended, consider whether you yourself have done the same to others.